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Could Susan Murphy-Milano’s “Time’s Up” have helped Susan Cox Powell before it was too late?

April 18, 2010 Comments off

Could Susan Murphy-Milano’s “Time’s Up” have helped Susan Cox Powell before it was too late?

Fort Lauderdale  News  Seattle Headlines Examiner

April 12, 10:50 PM Seattle Headlines Examiner Isabelle Zehnder

Time’s Up! by Susan Murphy-Milano

Courtesy of Susan Murphy-Milano
Via Lisa Michels

April 12, 2010 – According to Susan Murphy-Milano, Susan Cox Powell is a great example of a woman who could have benefited from her newly released book “Time’s Up!”.

Susan Murphy-Milano believes that with the proliferation of deaths due to domestic violence, something has to be done, something different, and something effective.

Murphy-Milano is a 20-year veteran of family violence, having discovered the bodies of her mother and father after her father shot and killed them both. The memory of that day is forever etched in her memory. She is driven to help other women who are victims of domestic violence in their own homes.

Her newest book, “Time’s Up”, A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,” was released April 12, 2010. (Click here to order.)

“Time’s Up!” guides the victim towards safety by showing them the unseen pitfalls of leaving a violent relationship and how to navigate around them.

“Time’s Up!” also has explicit details and instructions how to fill out an “Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit”, one of the unique things that Murphy-Milano has created and used through the years in high danger cases which has saved the lives of many.

You can actually live free from a life of abuse and violence using creative approaches developed by Susan Murphy Milano in her new book, “Time’s Up!”

You can’t Google the strategies and escape plans utilized by Susan who has devised a way that works and has been tested by time for over 20 years. Just like DNA, your road map will be uniquely your own because each safety plan is individual.

More than just a “to do” list, this book is a “must do” list if you are caught in a life threatening situation.

  • How to properly hire a lawyer,
  • How to find an apartment,
  • How to keep your personal records safe,
  • How to deal with stalking
  • How to set up visitation and child support
  • How to stay 10 steps ahead of the abuser

Susan Murphy Milano has been in the streets and shelters helping women escape from bad relationships and has developed creative ways out of frightening situations. There are domestic violence organizations and advocates who call on Susan daily to get her expert opinion on cases of battered women and how to get them on a track of freedom and safety. :

“I cannot emphasize how important this book is to all the women in your life.  Even if you are in a good, stable relationship, buy this book, keep it handy.  One day, when you least expect it, someone close to you will need it.  It can save a life—many lives.” `Diane Fanning, author of The Calylee Anthony Case “Mommy’s Liitle Giirl”, “Written in Blood”, ” Gone Forever” St. Martin’s Press  ( her website is http://www.dianefanning.com)

Previous books, “Defending Our Lives” and “Moving Out, Moving On” are benchmarks dealing with issues  domestic violence safety plans and are used throughout the country as examples of what to do should you be caught in a violent relationship. “Time’s Up!” uses the foundations and helps you to build your own, unique safety plan allowing you to escape safely and rebuild your life.

Following is an excerpt from another book written by Susan Murphy-Milano, “Moving out, moving on”:

If you are in a relationship, you must be treated with respect, which means your boyfriend or partner:

is willing to compromise
lets you feel comfortable being yourself
is able to admit to being wrong
tries to resolve conflict by talking honestly
respects your feelings, your opinions and your friends
accepts you saying no to things you don’t want to do (like sex)
accepts you changing your mind
respects your wishes if you want to end the relationship

When someone loves you; you feel valued, respected and free to be yourself. You shouldn’t be made to feel intimidated or controlled.

Think about your relationship – do you feel respected?

Susan Murphy-Milano is a specialist in family violence and works nationally with domestic violence programs, law enforcement and prosecutors providing technical and consulting services in “high risk” domestic violence and stalking related cases.

Her principal objective is to intervene before a victim is seriously injured or killed.

Murphy-Milano believes if missing women such as Susan Cox Powell, Renee Pernice, Stacy Peterson, and others, had created this abuse document the person responsible for their disappearance would be arrested (click here for abuse document and video).

Murphy-Milano is an advocate for women in abusive relationships across the country. She advocates for stronger laws to protect women. She has helped women feel protected by providing education and a safe haven. Click here for an overview of Susan’s work.

About Susan Murphy-Milano

Susan Murphy-Milano is often praised as one of the most dynamic and engaging speakers of our day in the domestic violence prevention field.

As an expert in the area of intimate partner violence and the prevention of homicide, Susan has created specific tools and procedures which the abused need to safely leave a violent relationship.

Her books, “Defending Our Lives”, “Moving Out, Moving On” and “Time’s Up!” are considered the “bibles” of how to make the move away from abuse and deal with the many confusing situations surrounding violence prevention, stalking, break-up or divorce.

Susan witnessed her father, a decorated Chicago Violent crimes Detective, brutally and violently attack her mother repeatedly. The words “if you leave I will kill you,” turned into reality the night Susan walked into her childhood home and found her mother murdered and her father in the next room dead from a self-inflicted gun-shot wound to the head.

Susan vowed then, and has, since the murder-suicide of her parents, carved out a road map making changes in the way the world looks at violence in and outside the home.

Her books and strategies are taught world-wide and used by law enforcement, domestic abuse advocates, social workers, attorneys, health care workers, human resource departments and domestic violence agencies. The comprehensive strategies and escape plans utilized by Susan have been successful and tested by time for over 20 years.

Susan uses humor, passion, and all her years of experience to motivate her audience to become more effective first responders, advocates and professionals in their work to stop family violence.

Susan’s quest for justice was instrumental in the passage of the Illinois Stalking Law and the Lauternberg Act.

She has been prominently featured in newspapers, magazines, radio and television including: The Oprah Winfrey Show, Larry King Radio, ABC’S 20/20, Justice Files, E-True Hollywood, CNN, Sunday Today Show Profile, Women’s Day, Family Circle, US News and World Report to name only a few.

She has frequently participated in guest media commentary panels on major news programs. She is a contributor to the online blogs Women and Crime Ink and the crime survivors blog Time’s Up.

Susan Murphy-Milano is the author of “Defending Our Lives” published by Doubleday books and “Moving Out Moving On” when a relationship goes wrong.

Her newest book, “Time’s Up!” A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships, is available on-line and in bookstores.

Susan is host of The Susan Murphy Milano Show and will be participating in the new television show, “Crime Wire” which will examine cases in which the investigations have left questions unanswered and possible criminal activity unexposed. Her Website is www.susanmurphymilano.com.

Resources:
Order “Time’s Up!”
Order “Moving out, moving on”
Order “Defending our Lives”
Susan Murphy-Milano’s website
Overview of Susan’s work
Abuse document and video

Time’s Up – A Book of Distinction

April 15, 2010 Comments off

TigressPen’s Surmisals

Until Susan Murphy Milano educated us all on the meaning of the term ‘Domestic Abuse,’ and it’s long term effect on women and children of the abused, anytime we heard of LE going to a home where a husband and wife were ‘arguing,’ one slapped the other stuff is the way we viewed it. Marital discord, family spat, heated argument – those were the terms we read and believed was truth in these situations. The incidents were nothing more than a shrug and head shake of ‘shame on them disgust,’ and quickly forgotten.

I read another blog piece on ‘Psychology Today,’ praising this book and the author, Robin Sax, mentioned OJ Simpson. That mention got me to thinking; I can’t remember spouse abuse of any kind being seriously discussed on talk shows before the OJ trial. Before the murder trial, when OJ Simpson beat on Nicole and she called the cops, they basically overlooked and did not really see abuse for what it really was, domestic violence; they saw him as the great football hero, Nicole as the argumentative wife with an attitude. Unfortunately, we saw domestic violence that way throughout the US long before they made Nicole’s abuse public; wives had an attitude and they were just ungrateful. The first question spouses were and, sadly, often still asked is ‘What did You do to deserve it?’ That question makes my blood pressure rise! In truth, wives do nothing to deserve it! Nobody deserves to be hit or beaten in any way. Now we see ‘marital discord’ that becomes physical for what it is – Abuse! And it’s abuse that could, and too often does, escalate to murder.

Women (and men who are abused) need ‘Time’s Up’. They not only need to read it, to think about their own situations, but need to be proactive and protect themselves and their children from an abuser. I think of Micah Pate, killed in April of 2009, and wonder how often or if she was abused by her husband, Thomas, prior to her murder. He claims accidental shooting but, (and that is a huge but) his story doesn’t add up in my mind. I think Micah could have greatly benefitted from ‘Time’s Up’ and it’s roadmap of advice.

‘Time’s Up’ is the best gift a person can give a friend whom they believe is in an abusive relationship. Teens need this book; teens abusing their girlfriend or boyfriend are more prevalent than many realize. Verbal, emotional and physical abuse is escalating in teens.

To quote Robin Sax – To say that Susan Murphy Milano has hit the nail on the head (again) is a total understatement! How true! That is more than an understatement; Susan has hit the nail dead-center, choreographed a life-saving-roadmap for the abused. No word can adequately express or exemplify how important ‘Time’s Up’ is for victims of abuse.

‘Time’s Up’ is more than a manual, a handbook, it’s more than just another book, it’s a ‘Lifesaver,’ a surefire roadmap chocked full of ways to document evidence and protect yourself; in protecting yourself, you are also protecting your children from a life with an abuser. Hopefully, we will eventually see a copy of ‘Time’s Up’ in every library, every police department, every school, every church and every shelter where those who need help can utilize it and protect themselves from an abuser.

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Advocate’s Book Review: TIME’S UP by Susan Murphy-Milano

April 13, 2010 Comments off

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Author:  Advocating Ethics Blog, Innerlite

Michigan, United States

Crime victim advocate with 16 years of experience both in the non -profit and legal sectors. NACP Credentialed Advanced Advocate #N78-877-3724. Domestic Violence Intervention Specialist & Sexual Assault Intervention Specialist I am currently a county-wide advocate housed in the Sheriff’s Department, though not a police employee. Keeps everyone honest and me from selling out.

Advocate’s Book Review: TIME’S UP by Susan Murphy-Milano

“Been there, done that…” Susan Murphy- Milano has turned a tired phrase into demonstrable realism through the gift of her newly published book, TIME’S UP: A GUIDE ON HOW TO LEAVE AND SURVIVE ABUSIVE AND STALKING RELATIONSHIPS. Susan’s writing is based on doing. It is based on the irrefutable credential of experience, both as a residual victim of interpersonal violence and a tireless advocate for others who suffer. This book is born from working in the trenches for twenty years and the necessity of crafting working solutions to help ensure individual safety from batters and stalkers.

TIMES UP is a comprehensive guide for women in danger. Every advocate owes it to those they work to assist to obtain this book.The contents provide specific steps towards safety and addresses issues that a person who is stressed and in fear may not think of. This guide can provide structure in the midst of chaos.

Among the tools and forms is the original idea of an “Abuse Affidavit”, a sworn statement detailing the facts of an individual’s victimization, preserving the specifics so they are not lost even if the victim is. It is difficult to think about speaking from the grave but no different than any life insurance policy obtained in consideration for those left behind.

An “Abuse Affidavit” has the additional psychological benefit of being forced face reality and admit that the potential for the ultimate kind of violence exists…and that if it occurs the perpetrator will be held accountable.

Purchase and read TIMES UP as an advocate to continue to learn and practice informed advocacy. Give TIMES UP to concerned friends or family members looking for solutions for a loved one who is in danger. Most of all, find a way to share this valuable guide with the domestic violence and stalking victims you know and work with. It has all the information and tools to empower a crime victim to save her own life.

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Advocate Pens Comprehensive Guide on How to Survive Abusive Relationships

April 11, 2010 Comments off

Advocate Pens Comprehensive Guide on How to Survive Abusive Relationships

Author:  David Lohr; ID. Investigate Life

April 10, 2010

David Lohr has been writing about crime and criminals for over 15 years. Readers and critics alike regard Mr. Lohr as one of the most prominent crime writers of the 21st century.

According to Susan Murphy-Milano, Susan Cox Powell and Stacy Peterson are great examples of women who could have benefited from her newly released book “Time’s Up!”

“With the proliferation of deaths due to domestic violence, something has to be done, something different, and something effective,” said Murphy-Milano, a domestic violence expert.

Susan Powell, 28, went missing under suspicious circumstances from West Valley City, Utah in December 2009. Police have named Susan’s husband, Joshua Powell, a “person of interest” in the case and have said they believe he has information that could help locate her.

Stacy Peterson was 23 years old when she went missing in October 2007. When questioned by police, Stacy’s husband, Drew Peterson, 56, claimed his wife had left him. Police found no evidence suggesting she left of her own accord, and Peterson was labeled a suspect. In May 2009, Peterson was arrested for the murder of his third wife, Kathleen Savio. He is currently in jail awaiting trial in that case. Stacy Peterson remains missing, and charges in her case have not yet been filed.

Neither Powell or Peterson have been charged in connection with their missing wives’ cases

Susan Murphy-Milano’s new book, “Time’s Up: A Guide on How to Leave and Survive Abusive and Stalking Relationships,” is due to be released on April 12, 2010.

“‘Time’s Up’ guides the victim towards safety by showing them the unseen pitfalls of leaving a violent relationship and how to navigate around them,” Murphy-Milano said.

The book also has explicit details and instructions on how to fill out an “Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit,” a form Murphy-Milano created and has used throughout the years in high risk cases.

Murphy-Milano is a specialist in family violence who works nationally with domestic violence programs, law enforcement officials and prosecutors, providing technical and consulting services in domestic violence and stalking cases. She says her principal objective is to intervene “before a victim is seriously injured or killed.”

In addition to her latest book, Murphy-Milano is also the author of “Defending Our Lives” and “Moving Out, Moving On.”

“Moving Out, Moving On” is a comprehensive, step-by-step, practical guide about ending relationships.

“Defending Our Lives” covers options that are available to battered women, as well as to their families and friends.

When she’s not busy penning new books, Murphy-Milano hosts “The Susan Murphy Milano Show” and also contributes to “Time’s Up!” and “Women In Crime Ink” online.  She is also preparing to participate in the new television show, “Crime Wire,” with hosts Dennis Griffin and Vito Colucci. The show will examine cases in which the investigations have left questions unanswered and possible criminal activity unexposed.

For more information on Murphy-Milano or to order one of her books, visit susanmurphymilano.com.

Ordering Information:  Amazon Online; http://www.susanmurphymilano.com and ImaginePublicity, contact@imaginepublicity.com,  843.808.0859

Nightmare At Richmond High School, CA

November 2, 2009 Comments off

RICHMOND HIGH SCHOOL SIGN

A gymnasium filled with decorations, balloons, neon and strobe lighting is the setting of most high school homecoming dances.  A DJ spinning today’s tunes for high school students; couples and friends dancing.  Perhaps some students shy (both female and male) sitting around at the tables chatting and enjoying the time that they will be to able replay in their minds and hearts forever.  Many wondering if so-and-so “likes” me……wondering if he may ask me to dance or if I ask her to dance will she accept.  Snacks filling the tables and an atmosphere filled with happiness, excitement and promises of a bright future – every young person’s dream when in high school.  An annual event that takes place after a homecoming football game whereas a king and queen are elected from the Senior class of the high school by the student body.  However, October 24th, 2009 will forever be changed for one young lady, her family, her friends and community.

The life of a 15 year-old young lady has been changed for the rest of her life as she was brutally beaten and gang raped for at least two-two and a half hours a week ago (October 24th) at Richmond High School, Richmond, California.  Many onlookers cheered and encouraged the assault on WITHOUT a second thought of coming to her rescue.  Can you imagine yourself or your child to be part of such a horrific crime without doing anything to try to stop the assault?  To try to assist this young lady?  Very few kids do not have cell phones today – in which it would have only taken a moment to dial 911……but no one did who was there.  Does anyone find this remotely disturbing?

The victim was lured by a male friend to a remote area of the high school campus while waiting for her father to pick her up from her homecoming dance.  According to  reports, after drinking brandy, the victim became incapacitated and vulnerable.   This young lady struggled, trying to fight off a group of youths who spent two hours or more raping, beating and robbing her.  Pictures and videos of the assault were taken by cell phones.  While this horrific assault was taking place, her father was looking for her as she was missing at the specified time and place as they had agreed to meet at the school.

No one called police until word of the ongoing rape spread to a house party, where an appalled female fellow student felt obligated to phone in the rumor as she overheard other kids talking about the assault.

When officers arrived on the scene, the assault was still going on.  Several suspects fled as officers arrived at the scene.  The victim was found badly injured and semi-conscious near a picnic table.   The victim was airlifted to a nearby hospital, admitted in critical condition.  Thank God, she stabilized overnight.

At the time of this posting five males have been arraigned in the shocking gang rape case that has horrified the entire nation.  The defendants, Manuel Ortega, 19, Cody Ray Smith, 15, Ari Abdallah Morales, 16 of and Marcelles James Peter, 17 filed into the Contra County Superior Court wearing bulletproof vests. Smith was the only to plead not guilty, while the rest declined to enter a plea. Smith, Morales and Peter are all being charged with rape and sexual penetration with a foreign object. Prosecutors say there are special circumstances that could make them eligible for life in prison. They will be charged as adults due to the severity of the crime.  A fifth suspect has been arrested, 21-year-old Salvador Rodriguez, but he has not been charged as of yet. He remains jailed.

My heart goes to this young lady and her family. As for the males that were involved in these crimes I only shake my head and pray that justice will be served.  I commend the young lady who called 911 as she did not give it a second thought to report the assault.  She is truly a humanitarian.

  • Why would a “friend” of anyone put you in harms way?  (Friends like this, who needs enemies?)
  • Didn’t the victim find it odd that this “friend” was leading her to a remote area and away from the dance and what could he have possibly said to her?  (Her intuition had to have kicked in at some point in time.  However, with proper training or education not always do people heed to this strongest feeling one will ever have.)
  • What is wrong with these young people (males) that would possess them to assault this young lady or any female?
  • How could others even look themselves in the mirror as they cheered and watched the assault?  (It has been reported that the onlookers cannot be charged – having a hard time digesting this.)

The victim’s family is asking for no more violence and to find ways in which the community can come together to work through what has happened to their daughter.

“Please do not respond to this tragic event by promoting hatred or by causing more pain. We have had enough violence already in this place. If you need to express your outrage, please channel your anger into positive action,” the girl’s family wrote.

“Work toward changing the atmosphere in our schools and in this community so that this kind of thing never happens again.”

Parents are volunteering to assist at the high school in numerous ways.

The family has a deep spiritual bond – “Through God’s unconditional love, He will give you continual strength.”

A friend of the victim has blasted the school officials whereas whites are a minority.  There is a strong need for more security inside and outside of the high school.

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