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Life After Abuse…Success Survivors

December 24, 2010

Sometimes life throws us the very worst it has to offer. It did for me. From the age of 5 to until the age of 20, I endured what most people only imagine in their worst nightmares. From severe abuse at the hands of my parents, to rape, to watching my best friend’s murder, I went through the figurative “wringer”. It took years of therapy and medication for me to be able to cope with all that I had been through. Yet I still felt an empty spot, like there was something that needed to be fulfilled.

It was the 13th anniversary of Tess’s murder. I felt like I HAD to do something to honor her memory. I recalled that she used to love reading the short stories I wrote, so I decided to write one especially for her. I wrote HER story: the story of her murder and what took place afterward. To my utter surprise, it was tremendously healing for me. So, I kept writing. The next thing I knew, the little story of Tess, had become part of a book about my life! I never imagined when I wrote it that I would publish it, or that one day I would speak out publicly against domestic violence. Yet here I am. And the response has been overwhelming.

People I’ve never even met are sending me e-mails with loving thoughts for healing and blessings. It’s very touching to say the least! I can’t even begin to say how grateful I am to each and every one of them or to tell them how much of an impact they have made on my life. Their words of encouragement and love have forever changed the course of my life. I’m doing things now, that I never imagined myself doing. And I’m a different person now, than I ever imagined I would be. I am stronger, and more together now than I ever have been before in my life.

I won’t hide in the shadows keeping my secrets to myself anymore. I won’t pretend that nothing happened and shove it aside. I am a survivor. And I am NOT afraid to talk about it anymore. I am NOT alone anymore. And I am at peace. And if I, Little ol’ me, can survive the things I did and be OK, then anyone can survive! A wise teacher once told me that the first rule of survival is wanting to. How true that is! All you have to do is want to, the rest will fall into place. You just have to make it happen. And that’s what I want to do. I want to help people take that first little step toward healing. Because that’s all it takes: just one step. The Universe, or God or whatever you call it, will do the rest. Everything happens for a reason. If you’re reading this right now, there’s a reason for it. You might not know what it is today, or even tomorrow. But someday, you will know and it will make sense. Believe it.

BOOK SYNOPSIS

Imagine eating bugs to get away from a horrid situation or watching helplessly as your best friend is murdered right in front of you. One woman did and survived to tell about it. A riveting story of survival and the triumph of the human spirit, “The Truth About Luci” gives us an inside glimpse into the world of V.K. Lindsey. She speaks candidly about the many horrors she faced growing up and how she was able to forge ahead and eventually free herself from the nightmarish situations she was in.

But there’s more to the story than just abuse, tragedy and murder. “Luci” also suffered from disturbing premonitions which haunted her throughout her childhood. In an inside glimpse of childhood ESP, V.K. Lindsey describes the processes she went through as a child having to cope with her unusual skill and the impact it had on both she and her family.

The Truth About Luci” Is a must-read for anyone who has ever experienced Domestic Violence either personally or professionally or who is curious about premonitions.

AUTHOR BIO: V.K. Lindsey

V.K. Lindsey is the author of “The Truth About Luci –Based on a True Story”. The book was published in September, 2010 and so far has garnered some positive press. She is speaking out publicly against domestic violence and has several events scheduled in the near future. V.K. Lindsey is the author of an on-line newsletter and is currently writing two books. She enjoys camping, hiking and quilting and spending time with family and friends.

Silent Cries is the insightful and thought-provoking new book by best-selling author Lisa J. Peck. This is the story of how Charlene, an upper middle-class woman endures domestic violence, escapes, and finds love again.

The book is written as email correspondence between Charlene and her friends and husband. Although written in the style of fiction, this “novel” is based upon real-life events that occurred in the author’s life. This book displays the emotional reality of abuse and why it is so hard for women to escape. Charlene is, in reality, trapped by emotional, spiritual, and physical abuse.

Lisa herself took classes on the subject of domestic violence and eventually educated herself safely out of her situation. She is now a Certified Growth Climate Relationship Specialist and Educator. She teaches other victims and abusers how to stop the chain of domestic violence, which is demonstrated in her book.

This book not only helps the victims of domestic violence but also provides a ray of hope to all those individuals faced with challenging tasks, as well as the necessary courage and willpower to accomplish all they want to achieve. You will learn to assert yourself and to walk, unshaken, toward the realization of your dreams of freedom — freedom from challenges and freedom from fear. This book is a testimony to the fact that you can accomplish even the most daunting of tasks, with determination and faith.

This insightful and thought-provoking novel unfolds through personal email, providing an intimate, computer-screen view of Charlene’s life.

This is an opportunity for YOU to accompany Charlene on this unique email journey through her abusive marriage, divorce, single parenthood, and Internet dating adventures. Experience with her the highs and lows of life after divorce. Charlene grows and develops as a friend, mother, and individual, even as she reaches out to others through email. An aspect of domestic violence that often goes unheard — emotional abuse — is explored in this book. The reader is provided with effective solutions to put an end to the cycle of violence.

Unlike other books, this novel displays the raw, emotional aspects of domestic violence. It also shows why women find it so difficult to escape from it. In most cases, the women are not even able to identify that they are being subjected to emotional abuse . . . until it is too late, when the effects are already far-reaching and beyond salvage. Lisa lived in the trenches and was able to escape from her “golden cage” to become a successful survivor. She teaches that no situation is beyond salvage, and how you too can find a way out.

Excerpt:

“Judy, I’ve been abused. My father abused me, my past boyfriends, and now sometimes my husband. It’s so hard to realize this. I don’t want to be one of those victimized people. I have a college degree, beautiful children, and an upper level middle-class life. How can I be an abused wife? The pain that’s going on with all this realization is intense. It will either break me or heal me. I’m not sure which. I’m praying for strength to face my demons.

In Silent Cries, Charlene makes a list of all the problems she is having with her husband, Brad. It makes her feel much better, even though she wonders what the heck she is doing with him. By leaving him, she chooses happiness. She cannot help feeling that this is the first day of the rest of her life! This is a life-changing decision that many women lack the courage to make. They would rather endure a lifetime of misery, than take the risk of being a single parent. You can learn exactly how she put an end to her misery and chose hope. Read the book. Learn how Charlene did it.

In Silent Cries, Charlene finds the courage to break free from an abusive relationship and break the cycle of domestic violence. She takes on the challenge of being a single parent. Discover how she makes a new life for herself. Lisa Peck, the author, says that once you are out of the marriage and safely away from domestic violence, you might still have to face many problems. She wishes she could have known what was in store for her as a single mother. Find out how Charlene feels about being a single parent.

Silent Cries is not just another book on the subject of domestic violence and abuse. Lisa J. Peck, author of Silent Cries, has suffered domestic abuse in her own life. She learned to recognize it and face it bravely, and she had the courage to break free from an abusive spouse. She studied domestic violence and is now a Certified Growth Climate Relationship Specialist and Educator. She teaches other victims of abuse, and abusers, how to stop the chain of domestic violence. Her book teaches readers how to stand tall, brave adversities with courage, and rekindle their hopes for a good life.

This is not a reference text about domestic violence. It is not an instructional manual on how to escape from a batterer. Plenty of these exist. It is a travel guide to a country no one visits willingly, the collective tales of past travelers making the landscape less threatening, less alien. I hope the many voices in this book will convince you that these stories belong to all of us. Domestic abuse doesn’t just happen “out there” somewhereit happens in our town, in our neighborhood, on our street. It happens to people we see at the supermarket, the movie theater, the ballet, the bowling alley, and the PTA board meeting. It happens to our friends, our coworkers, and our family members. Women who have experienced domestic abuse look just like everyone else. They look just like me. Abused women look just like Judy North, a first-grade teacher from Nebraska who remained with her abusive husband for ten years, until the night she finally stood up to him…and woke up in the emergency room. Abused women look just like Whitney Benson, a Mormon college student from southern Utah. She worries about the scars on her face from her boyfriend’s class ring; I worry about the scars on her soul from his carefully crafted campaign of criticism, intimidation, and punishing rape. And abused women look just like Andrea Hartley, a pediatrician in her late forties who considers herself extremely fortunate. Although the man she married when she was thirty proved to be extremely violent, the emotional support of her family, friends, and medical colleagues enabled her to leave him only four months later. They come from all walks of life. Some are well educated; others barely finished high school. Some comefrom wealthy families; others come from poor ones. Some witnessed terrifying family violence as children; others never heard an angry word. Some were raised by warm, supportive families; others by cold, distant families. Some married young; others married late. They worship in churches, in synagogues, or not at all. They come from big cities, small towns, farming communities, and suburbs. What these women have in common is that each was in an intimate relationship with a man who abused her. Some were abused physically. Some were abused sexually. All were abused psychologically…the most devastating type of abuse, leaving the deepest wounds. This is not a book about guns, knives, emergency rooms, or police reports. Many stories focus instead on the subtle campaign of abuse, wearying and corrosive, which trapped their teller in a web of daily threat. Yet despite the humiliation, fear, and isolation, each woman managed to escape from her abuser. Theirs are stories, not of frailty, but of clarity, resourcefulness, and strength.

A Note From Anny:

For any victim in her transition to survivor know that through your courage, strength and determination that there is light at the end of the tunnel.  At times things may seem bleak but you have to put one foot in front of the other, step-by-step you are beginning your healing process.  No one can put your healing on a timeline, you will heal in your own time.  As a fellow survivor, a Success Survivor, I commend each one of you.  You are the light, you are worthy, you are strong, you are determined and so much more.  Don’t try to rush the process as it can become overwhelming.  Make a list and as you accomplish things that you feel that you must address cross them off – that is true success.  You must remember that the abuse that you endured did not happen overnight and it will take time.   Trust me, when you have healed you will be set free and oh what a feeling.

I wish each of you, my Sisters Overcoming Abusive Relationships, S.O.A.R.) I wish you a Blessed Christmas and a healthy prosperous New Year.

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  1. December 25, 2010 at 2:48 PM

    Thank you Anny, you are such an inspiration to the masses. May God bless you in every area of your life and continue to grow your cause as you minister to the hurting. Merry Christmas my friend.

    Love to you,
    Renita

    • December 25, 2010 at 2:53 PM

      Thanks so much Renita. Wishing you and yours a wonderful, Blessed Christmas and a healthy, prosperous New Year.
      Much Love,
      Anny

  2. March 3, 2012 at 3:25 PM

    I FEEL AT MY WHITS END . 1 YEAR HAS PASSED SINCE I ESCAPED 14 YRS OF ABUSE,AND THIS TIME I ESCAPED WITHOUT TRYING TO COMMIT SUISIDE,. BUT COURT TOOK 1 YEAR AND YES HE,S WALKIN FREE, MY LIFE IS A WRECK , I MOVED TO A SMALL RENTED HOUSE AFTER REFUGE AND EVERY DAY I FEEL LIKE THE SEXUAL AND MENTAL ABUSE IS GETTIG WORSE EVEN THOUGH HE,S NOT THERE I FEEL I CANT ESCAPE HM AFTER ALL THESE YEARS OF TORTURE, IS THER ANY ONE ELSE OUT THERE WHO FEELS LIK THIS . . .JU. . .

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